To Do Lists Rule My Life

To Do:

* Finish and send e-mails to long neglected friends

* Plan Sunday school Music: 12-20 core songs

* Work on Educational Counselor application for a local community college

* Make networking phone calls

* Homework:
      Master Application – due October 10
      News Article – due October 11

* Order new checks from bank

* Deposit unemployment check

* Order business cards (or decide to make them) (http://www.vistaprint.com/)

* Practice a few songs on guitar for our graduation celebration


Early morning, I hit the ground running and drink my cup of dark, rich liquid energy. I am learning new things and making friends in class, which is enjoyable and exciting. I will miss them when it is all over. Right now I miss having time to ponder and write; at least tonight I don’t have a meeting to go to or too many chores to do. I am up in my room listening to the History channel and typing by candle light.

Another seasonal change that I didn’t mention last week, there is a new television series. I watched part of  the first episode of HBO’s Rome and was impressed with the cast and quality production values. Unfortunately, the violence and sex are a bit much for me, so I won’t be watching it. Given the historical and cultural source, I should not be surprised at all. I have seen one other new TV show pilot and also the first two episodes of the new season of West Wing, an old favorite. The new show that I saw is Surface. It seems fun and intriguing; in fact I am staying up late tonight just so I can watch an episode that I missed that is being re-aired on the Sci-fi channel. Serendipity, the new Joss Whedon movie, was released last weekend. I saw the trailer early this summer and it looked great. I wanted to see it on Saturday, but was short of time and ambition. I watched Ghost in the Shell 2: Innocence on DVD with my brother-in-law instead. The animation in that movie is incredible in detail and color. I have a hard time deciding whether I like the original or the sequel in this series. My brother-in-law likes the story in the second one, but finds the first one more watchable and enjoyable overall.

I am trying to stay healthy, since many people in class and in my family are fighting cold and flu bugs.

A Change of Season

Fall is here, announcing itself in the crisp evening air. BSF (Bible Study Fellowship) and Sunday school started two weeks ago. I’ve been in school now for three weeks. It has been years since I’ve helped with Sunday school, but now I’m co-teaching 1st and 2nd grade and leading the songs. I’ve always liked fall. By the end of the summer I was ready to get back to class. In college it was especially exciting because everyone had gone different places and done different things over the summer; there were lots of stories to catch up on. Starting new classes was always intriguing, too. I went to the bookstore and found all my books, then brought them home to browse and preview. The table of contents, chapter headings, charts, and pictures formed a landscape map of an unfamiliar, undiscovered country.

I can’t believe that Rita is hitting the same area as Katrina. It is very hard to understand all the suffering and destruction. We are telling the story of Noah and the Ark tomorrow to the children.  Some people are saying that this is God’s fault or that he is causing this to punish people for bad behavior. If that was the case, the punishment would not be limited to one area. The whole earth would be destroyed because there are all kinds of people doing all kinds of evil everywhere. No person is completely innocent. God does allow things to happen, though. Perhaps this is a sign of global warming and the damage we have done to the environment.  Who can say the reason why? Right now I don’t think it matters; people are in desperate need. Being unemployed, I haven’t been able to donate money. I have been considering what I can do. I can donate blood. I can give clothes. I can knit hats and scarves. I can give my time to an organization that is helping. I haven’t taken any action yet, but I will. I must.

We have a homework assignment over this weekend to list and analyze the “good experiences” we have had in our lives, from as early as we can remember. Anything we have done that did well, invested ourselves in, and were proud of the results. That has been an interesting and encouraging exercise. I was surprised as I looked over the list. I have never thought of myself as a particularly brave or risk-taking person. My Dad taught me to think carefully and be cautious, and I generally follow that example. I also have anxieties and fears in certain situations, as everyone does. As I looked over the list, I was surprised to see that I have done many things that were risky. Most of them were small risks, but they are not insignificant because they prepared me for larger ones. I never imagined as an insecure teenager that I would ever live or travel in a foreign country. I secretly dreamed of being an exchange student, but was too scared to even apply. But in college, I finally had enough confidence to apply for a summer volunteer program in Mexico. That whet my appetite and gave me my first experience teaching English, leading me to go to Korea almost immediately after graduation. Of course, being my father’s daughter, I researched the job market and working conditions for English teachers overseas before I decided what countries to focus on. Later when I finished my graduate degree, I took a risk in working with a friend of mine on a start-up educational organization. I worked in a low-paying human services job while I spent free time working on a pilot program. We ended up getting a grant and we did a bigger project and got paid some money for it. I still had to work the other job. In the end we didn’t get any further funding and it fizzled out. Needing a better job, I went back to Korea for my second “tour”.  I still felt successful because I was willing to take a risk and we did a good job on our projects. New and challenging things don’t always work out the way you want, but I landed on my feet. It was an exciting learning experience because I developed the whole curriculum from scratch.

I also remembered many physical activities that I really enjoyed and did well. Roller-skating, ice-skating, and bike riding, even dancing. I was not born to be a couch potato. I have the coordination and ability to enjoy healthy physical activity. I just stopped valuing it and developed an attitude. No, I have not been exercising for probably a couple of months. I want to start again, but I don’t quite want it enough yet. Mom has not been exercising, either. She is feeling it. I don’t feel it now, but I know I will eventually.

Pretty Fingers...

typing on the keyboard. Buffed, shiny nails and moisturized cuticles. Yes, I gave myself a manicure with a new buffing system (a rectangular buffing block, cuticle oil, scented hand lotion, and a nail file) that I got on special at the mall. It was probably not as amazing a deal as the saleswoman told me, but I’m pleased nonetheless. I can see my reflection in the super-gloss shine. It’s all a part of dressing for success, right? I also got a set for Mom as a birthday gift. I think she’ll really like it. She has the best nails in the family because they are strong and grow very nicely. People ask her if they are real or acrylic. She doesn’t have the patience to paint them regularly and doesn’t like the fact that polish chips after several days. This is an easy to maintain and impossible to ruin option. No waiting for polish to dry or getting sheet imprints if all the layers of varnish (base coat, color, and protective top coat) haven’t dried well enough before you go to sleep. I also won’t be saying any of these phrases, “Can you pick that up for me, I just did my nails?” or, “Arghh, I just ruined my nail!”

I haven’t had the patience for all that for the last couple of years, so I haven’t done anything with them for a while. I have in the past spent lots of time and money on polish to do my own manicures. Other times I have been a regular manicure patron. My favorite manicurist ever was a man at a salon in Korea who gave the best hand massages. One special memory is when my sister and I gave each other pedicures on the night before her wedding. What color did we use? OPI’s “I’m Not Really A Waitress”, a really vivid red with a bit of shimmer. Light bulb flash! I need to get a job writing names for OPI’s colors! I think I just solved my career dilemma! They have the most fun naming their colors. I wonder if they really do have that as a full-time job. Maybe it is just one project that their copywriters do. I would still sign up.  

I thought that I would never get the list of things done that I had to do today. I’ve made big progress on everything, though. Several things needed to be gathered and prepared for Sunday school in the morning. Yes, I’m volunteering this year. I haven’t done Sunday school for a long time, but the week of Vacation Bible School was a lot of fun. I have a teaching partner, which is good because I don’t want to do it alone. It is less work and more fun to have another adult in the room. It is also required for safety reasons.

Yesterday I went to the job fair at the local mall, which was announced in my class last week. I thought it would be a good opportunity to practice interviewing and networking. I spent the morning printing out copies of resumes, reference contacts, and even some writing samples.  It’s best to be prepared because you never know what businesses and schools might be there. It was a bustling event, with a whopping 4 companies participating. There was an insurance company, a toy store, a direct sales (at home parties) company, and one more that I forgot because it was so completely uninteresting. The best part of the 10 minutes that I lingered there was getting a free hand massage with mango lotion at the direct sales table. They sell home spa and skin care products. That mango lotion was luscious, reminding me of the mango body butter that I had several years ago from the Body Shoppe.  I got a catalogue so that when I have a job and money I can place orders when I want to. It was a very fruitful afternoon.  

Assessments, and More Assessments

It’s almost the end of the second week of class. Today we took skill tests and completed a comprehensive career assessment CAPS, COPES, and COPS. My primary work values are orderliness, social and aesthetic. My primary interest areas are communication, service professional and artistic skilled. Pretty obvious, looking at those, why I became a teacher; it was never a problem of not liking the job. Perhaps I just need to adjust the place where I think I fit. Academic advising is something I’ve been looking at. It might be fun to teach a class like the one I’m taking now. Writing and editing are also a good fit with my interests, values and skills. This assessment confirmed what I was thinking and helps me to feel more confident that I’m headed in the right direction. I’m still tired. Last night I fell asleep at 10:15 PM, which is early for me. One thing that has been tough for me in this class is that we have been doing all of these group dynamics exercises. Some of them have been really challenging and gotten fairly chaotic and intense. I considered myself strong in cooperation and teamwork, but this has shown me that there are still weaknesses and things I can improve. Being humbled is a good thing, but not necessarily fun. Between that and the skill tests, this week has been mentally and emotionally tiring.

First Week of Class (as a student again)

It was a busy and eventful week. I learned about my personality color, group dynamics and teambuilding. Very warm, fuzzy stuff, but sort of fun. I look at this like a support group, and that’s partly what it is. I will also learn more computer skills with Office, which should prove useful. It is kind of strange for me to be a student in this class, since I was recently teaching adults myself. The other students are interesting and I’m making some new friends. My homework is to take a couple of career interest assessments. I took one today and was having a little trouble over-analyzing my answers. They ask basically the same few questions 20 different ways with just slightly different wording. “Well, I thought I meant it when I chose the answer last time.” The biggest tensions were between practical or aesthetic and leadership/setting my own course or following others. I like to have it both ways. I want to include both aesthetic and practical values in my work, hopefully an equal amount of each. I don’t want to have to order people about and be the only leader, but I want room to control my own work and be involved in decisions. It is very clear that I want to work with people and like enjoy working in a collaborative, somewhat relaxed environment. I have known that all along. Those have been my best work experiences. We’ll see if the results come back weird. It has been a good, busy weekend. I went to the Western Washington State Fair, which opened yesterday. Highlights were the draft horse exhibition and the Royal Canadian Mounted Police. I resisted the urge to buy things from the commercial vendors. There was some pretty silver jewelry, but I was strong. I learned about a rare breed of sheep, the only spotted one, as I walked through the barns. They are called Jacob Sheep, after the Biblical patriarch who watched Laban's flocks and bred his own herd of spotted sheep. See the website at Bide a Wee Farm.

Sunday Afternoon Matinee

I saw The Constant Gardener this afternoon with my father and brother-in-law. Based on the John Le Carre novel, it definitely has a political message and agenda. That said, the message never overtook the story in the way that sometimes happens, turning a well-intentioned film into a preachy bore. Equal parts nail-biting thriller and unconventional love story, I found myself mesmerized. The cast is wonderful! Well, I have admired Ralph Feinnes since Schindler's List, so I'm not objective about him. Rachel Weisz was fantastic in a brave and dynamic role. There were excellent veteran character actors in supporting roles, and I'd list some names, but they are more recognizable by face. Go to the IMDB if you really must know who they are.

I also finally checked out Technorati to find out what it was. I wish I had gone there earlier. It's a great way to search through the blogosphere for the latest posts on whatever topics you are interested in. You can also put tags on your entries and have your entries searchable in their topical database.

Technorati tags: Movies, cinema

The Week is Finally Over

Yesterday I wanted to stay home and breathe a little easier. I ended up getting a call in the morning and going to an unexpected meeting. At the mandatory orientation I went to on Tuesday, I found out about a training program that I could attend for free and get lots of support in my career transition (aptitude tests, personality tests, career exploration). I can even learn some new computer skills (PowerPoint and Excel). I know a bit about Excel, but I have just scratched the surface. I will get more help with my resume as well as interview and job search skills. I could probably do OK without it, but I find the support encouraging and helpful. I hope to discover some new career ideas, or at least confirm that I am going in the right direction. It is a seven week program with classes all day (8:30 AM -5:00 PM) from Monday through Thursday. Yesterday I had to go to the site to register. It isn’t far from my house, so that is very convenient. I took the bus, which means I walked a lot yesterday. Can I count that as a workout?

Today I stayed home all day. Mom and Dad went away for the long weekend, so I have the whole house to myself. I enjoy the peace and quiet of a day alone. I have puttered around, getting some housework and organizing done- all at my own pace. This morning I watched CNN for a long time, which allowed me to witness the arrival of the first caravan of food, water and supplies arrive at the Superdome. That is the first hopeful thing I’ve seen in days. I don’t even have words for the things I’ve heard and read. The Interdictor is blogging a chronicle of the chaos as he is fighting to survive and help others do the same in New Orleans.

Tonight my brother-in-law and I may go out to eat and see a movie (The Constant Gardener). It depends on how tired he is after work. They have been offering extra hours and he has been working very hard. If we stay home I’ll grill hamburgers. We have pepper jack slices and barbeque sauce.

Running on the Treadmill

That is what I feel like I'm doing now as I try to relax at the end of a long, tiring week. But it's only Wednesday night, almost Thursday morning. Ahhh! Not sure if I've really accomplished all that much either. The wrenching stories of Katrina's destruction and the plight of the people who were in her path are so tragic. I'll never forget the short spot that I saw of a news reporter trying to interview one of the refugees who was wandering around. He recounted how his family was on top of the roof and their house had split in half. He had tried to hold on to his wife, who had fallen into the water. He couldn't. She told him to take care of their children and grandchildren just before she was lost in the flood waters. He had no idea if she had managed to survive or where she might be. If I had a job, I would donate money. What can I do but pray? I haven't done that, either, because I've been maddly working on getting that application in for the copywriting job and finishing the writing sample to go with it. I faxed it tonight shortly before 10:00 PM. I had a mandatory class all morning at WorkSource. This afternoon I edited it and proofread it over and over, but I found a questionable capitalization and a missing comma after I was scanning the copy that I faxed. Hopefully they won't notice. I made the corrections to the file on the computer. At least I'll be ready with a good sample for the next copywriting job that I find. I also did some editing of yesterday's post because the sentences were choppy and I found some errors. I tried to rush it yesterday because I was excited and wanted to get it posted. I was also more focused on getting all of the links in. My mind has been racing like this all day and doesn't seem to be slowing down. I was in such a zone last night that I totally forgot that I was supposed to go to worship team practice. I am scheduled to sing this Sunday. It would be easier if I had to go to the practice every week, but when it's every-other week (or depending on whatever Sundays you are scheduled for) I don't get into a routine. I'm in my room with the light low and the radio turned to one of my favorite stations, Classical King FM, 98.1, hoping that I'll start to relax. I haven't had more caffeine than usual, but it almost feels like it.

Tacoma, a City Reborn

Last night my aunt was in town and stayed with us. She came to Washington for a few days to see Grandpa and then drove over here to spend the night with us before flying back to Colorado. We went out for a drive and some sightseeing in Tacoma, which used to be a dying industrial pit with a decaying downtown. Other than the crime rate, the city was know for the “Tacoma Aroma” because of the noxious spewings from a paper mill that is now closed. There has been a great effort to revitalize the city. In 1990 the University of Washington opened a satellite campus near downtown and has restored many old buildings. Union Station, a brick building in Beaux Arts style that served as the train depot, has been rescued from demolition and made into the courthouse. Next to Union Station, a new brick building was built to house the Washington State History Museum. On the other side is the very modern styled Tacoma Art Museum. Dale Chihuly, an internationally famous local glass artist, is the driving force behind the The Museum of Glass, which includes a glass blowing workshop and school. They are renovating housing and building new apartment buildings downtown so that people can move into the area, making it more active and encouraging business. It hasn’t all been smooth. Tacoma Actors Guild, the only professional theater in the region, outside of Seattle, had great financial difficulties last year and closed down temporarily. With fundraising and the partnership of Bellevue Civic Theatre, they opened their doors again to finish the season. They will open the 2005-2006 season in September with Noises Off. The transformation of the city’s atmosphere is dramatic! Now I would enjoy living downtown or in North Tacoma. There are still bad areas, like Hilltop. That has been an infamously crime ridden area for many years. There is one area of Tacoma that has really nice old homes. Some of them need work and others have been well-maintained or lovingly restored. There are several old apartment buildings with names like “The Whitman” and brick or stone exteriors. The architecture ranges from Victorian to Neo Classical, Colonial Revival and Tudor Revival. We drove around looking at them. It reminds me of Browns Edition in Spokane, where my mother grew up. Her family inherited an uncle’s Victorian house with all the furniture. In fact, I sleep on an antique brass bed that came from that house. Anyway, all of those houses have so much character and distinction. None of them is alike. Just the opposite of boring suburban houses and apartment complexes. We had dinner at a tavern, The Harmon, in the university district. It brews its own tasty ales and has great food. Monday happens to be $3.00 steak night. We didn’t realize that until we had already ordered our meals, though. Dad had fish and chips and everyone else ordered one of their specialty burgers. Mine had blue cheese and mushrooms. We all had a great time on our little tour. My aunt had never been to Tacoma before.

It has been a busy couple of days. I had an appointment this morning at WorkSource. This afternoon has been busy updating and revising some more. Since I am looking to start in a new field, I have to work hard at effectively marketing my transferable skills. I found an opening for a copywriter, but they want a portfolio sample along with the resume. I guess I’ll just have to start a portfolio. Perhaps a short article about one of the development projects in Tacoma!

Still haven’t gotten back to exercising. It’s been quite a while, now.

Auld Lang Syne

Friends have played a very important role in my life because they have often acted as a family. For single people especially, friends are form of family. But over the tough times of this transition, I have sometimes gone into a shell when I felt depressed and frustrated. That made it hard to reach out and communicate with anyone. I have several friends living very far away, as in out of the country. I kept in contact for a while, but it has been so long since I’ve sent them an e-mail. I feel bad, which makes me less likely to start writing to them. A vicious cycle begins. I miss them. I am sorry about neglecting them. Of course they are free to write me at any time and haven’t done so. It is somewhat mutual, the neglect. I have lost track of who technically owes the next e-mail. Does it matter? Philosophically I understand that people go in and out of each other’s lives and very few friendships can last a lifetime. But the cost of that reality is sometimes painful. I find myself developing new friendships and enlarging my community. That is good and exciting. Then I find myself thinking that I could or should be spending that time or energy reaching out to dear people from the past. Of course, it doesn’t have to be either or. There isn't a black and white choice here. I can embrace new friends and do my best to keep in touch with and honor old friendships. That is naturally what people do. “Make new friends, but keep the old. One is silver and the other’s gold” as the old lyrics say. Why am I feeling so nostalgic and guilty recently? I need to just write to them, regardless of my guilt or angst. I made a list of them a couple of weeks ago. There are about eight people on that list that I haven't brought myself to write to yet. That is about 2/3 of the total list. Not all of them are overseas.

Master List

All the jobs and significant volunteer activities that I’ve ever done in my life:

Babysitting
High School Concert Choir (1984-1987)
Sunday School Teacher- Pre-school (1985-1987)
Chorus Member in the High School Musical (Fall 1996)
University Concert Choir- (1987-1989)
Receptionist (Summer 1987)
Dishwasher (Fall Quarter 1987)
Day-Camp Counselor (Summer 1988 and Summer 1989)
Market Research (Summer 1990)
English Teacher and Church Ministry Volunteer in Mexico (Summer 1991)
Pro-Life Book Table Volunteer (1987-1988)
Pro-Life Book Table Coordinator (1988-1989)
Elderly Ministry Volunteer (1990-1991)
Elderly Ministry Coordinator (1991-1992)
Writing Tutor (Winter 1993)
ESL Teaching Assistant (Winter 1993)
Jewelry Sales Associate at a mall kiosk (February 1993)
ESL Teacher (April 1993 - April 1994)
ESL Teacher (June 1994 – May 1996)
Co-leader: Pioneer Girls, 5th and 6th Grade Group (1994 – 1996)
Worship Team (1994 - 1996)
Teaching Assistant (Fall 1996)
ESL Instructor (June 1997 – December 1998)
Editor for a student’s Master’s Thesis (1998)
ESL Coordinator and Instructor for a vocational program (February 1999 – August 2000)
Human Service’s Relief Staff (February 1999 – February 2000)
Personal Care Assistant/Home Health Care (February 2000 – June 2001)
English Instructor (August 2001 – August 2003)
Church Choir Member (August 2001 – January 2003)
Church Choir Leader (February 2003 – August 2003)
Bible Study Leader (February 2003 – August 2003)
Tutor/Substitute ESL Instructor (November 2003 – March 2004)
Scorer for standardized writing tests (March 2004 – July 2004)
Seasonal Sales Associate for a clothing store (November 2004 – December 2004)
English Instructor (January 2005 – March 2005)
English Instructor (January 2005 – June 2005)
Worship Team (June 2003 – Present)

More Recipes

I’ve been researching some recipes on the Internet after Mom and I watched Tyler cook one of my favorite Mexican dishes. Since we had Masala last night, I was also reminded of another Indian favorite, saag. Saag means spinach and there is a lovely Indian spinach sauce that goes well with lamb or chicken. I have also had similar spinach sauce with chunks of potato as a vegetarian dish. Here are the recipes that I found and where I found them.

* From Food Network

Chiles Rellenos with Picadillo
Show: Food 911
Much too much work for me to have patience for, so I'll not be trying this one. They looked delicious though. It was interesting to learn how they made one of my favorite Mexican dishes. Most restaurants around here don't do them very well, but there is one I found. I would decrease the amount of chipotles in the picadillo filling. The ranchero sauce sounds simple enough and versatile; it can be used for Huevos Rancheros or burritos or whatever you like. I plan on trying it.

Huevos Rancheros
Show: Emeril Live

Chilaquiles con Pollo: Tortilla Casserole with Chicken Breast
Chef: Priscilla Satcoff
There were several recipes on the site for this delicious Mexican brunch favorite. This one had fewer specialized (read: probably hard to find) Mexican cheeses.

Green Chicken Chilaquiles Casserole
Written by: M.S. Milliken & S. Feniger
This one has more ingredients but also gets rave reviews and is easy to prepare.

Lamb with Spinach Sauce (Saag Gosht)
Show: Chef Du Jour

Spinach with Tomato (Saag)
Recipe courtesy of Madhur Jaffrey, World Vegetarian, Clarkson Potter, 1999


* From YumYum.com

California Style Huevos Rancheros

Huevos Rancheros #2

Visiting

On Monday Mom, my brother-in-law, and I went to visit my grandfather. Between driving, running a few errands for him, and visiting, it took most of the day. He was in good spirits and the visit was pleasant. His health has been pretty stable for almost a year since he had a really bad crisis that lasted for 6 months, so we are very glad. I haven’t always had a good relationship or good attitude about him. He has said and done hurtful things over the years. But he has mellowed and I have learned to forgive and let go. In the last two years since I’ve seen him I see things that I didn’t see in him before. He showed amazing fortitude and resilience during his recurring bouts of illness last year. I personally didn’t think he could fight through it. He did and kept a positive attitude throughout. I gained a new respect for him. Yesterday was the second time he has seen my brother-in-law. Grandpa is impressed with him. He told me so a couple of weeks ago when Dad and I went up for a Saturday special event- the annual Luau. We are glad because He has very strong opinions, so if he takes a dislike to someone, then he isn’t likely to change his view.

On the way home we stopped at Trader Joe’s, a specialty grocery shop that also has great prices. I guess since they are a regional chain they can buy in bulk. They carry a lot of unique gourmet and healthy (organic, whole foods) items. What a fun place to shop! We don’t go there a lot because there isn’t one very close. I bought some ginger snaps, a couple bottles of cheap wine, and some ready-to-eat sushi (which I ate in the car for a late lunch). Mom got a couple of jars of simmer sauces to cook with chicken (masala and Thai green curry), some nan (Indian flat bread) and other things that I’ve forgotten. We ate the masala sauce and the nan tonight for dinner. Delicious.

Tuesday I applied for another job as a student advisor for an online university. I also started my “Master Application”. This is basically a reference document for me to catalog information about all of the jobs (volunteer or paid) that I’ve had in my lifetime. It is a good exercise for me to remember all of the things I’ve done and then reflect back on the specific skills, knowledge, and tools that I’ve used. When I finish, I’ll post a list of all the jobs I’ve ever had.

Tuesday night I watched Miami Ink, one of my favorite new shows. I don’t have any tattoos, but I like to see other people’s tattoos and the stories behind the designs they choose are interesting. I also like the artists’ personalities on the show. It seems like they have a lot of fun and really love the art of what they do. The work they do is beautiful. There was only one time I was ever tempted to get a tattoo. I knew exactly what design I wanted. I have a ring with the Chinese character for love. It is a very sentimental piece of jewelry and I wear it a lot. One day I lost it. I had become so accustomed to wearing it and felt so personally attached to the symbol. The specific character was chosen because it matches the meaning of my name. (Cheryl=beloved, dear one) I thought that if I tattooed the symbol on myself that I would never lose it. The idea comforted me. Later that day, I found the ring. All thought of getting the tattoo disappeared. The biggest thing that stops me is my low tolerance for pain. I also don’t like the idea of having it for the rest of my entire life. Friends who have them tell me that you don’t stop at one; you always want more. I don’t need another thing to obsess over like a permanently unfinished project.

We are planning another family visit to my great aunt on Friday. She had a fall and broke her hip a couple of months ago. She returned home recently and we haven’t seen her since we visited her at the hospital.

Typical Sunday

Another typical Sunday. I enjoy the USA lineup, The 4400 and Dead Zone. I remember Anthony Michael Hall from Sixteen Candles and then as one of the youngest cast members ever on Saturday Night Live. Unfortunately it wasn’t a good year for the show and Anthony wasn’t a strong member of the cast. Who can believe he was so skinny and lanky then. He barely has a neck now with his broad, athletic build. Anyway, I like Dead Zone because the story is good, not for him. Both shows are tense, dramatic science-fiction with conspiracy overtones. Good fun.

I filed for my second week of unemployment over the Internet tonight.

The scripture readings in the lectionary this week really encouraged me about my life and my situation. Here is a bit from the Old Testament reading.

Isaiah 51:1-3, 6

Listen to me, you who pursue righteousness
and who seek the LORD :
Look to the rock from which you were cut
and to the quarry from which you were hewn;
look to Abraham, your father,
and to Sarah, who gave you birth.
When I called him he was but one,
and I blessed him and made him many.

The LORD will surely comfort Zion
and will look with compassion on all her ruins;
he will make her deserts like Eden,
her wastelands like the garden of the LORD.
Joy and gladness will be found in her,
thanksgiving and the sound of singing...

Lift up your eyes to the heavens,
look at the earth beneath;
the heavens will vanish like smoke,
the earth will wear out like a garment
and its inhabitants die like flies.
But my salvation will last forever,
my righteousness will never fail.


It reminds me of another favorite verse in Isaiah that I've been thinking about and reading over the last few months.

Isaiah 55:1-3

Come, all you who are thirsty,
come to the waters;
and you who have no money,
come, buy and eat!
Come, buy wine and milk
without money and without cost.
Why spend money on what is not bread,
and your labor on what does not satisfy?
Listen, listen to me, and eat what is good,
and your soul will delight in the richest of fare.

Give ear and come to me;
hear me, that your soul may live.
I will make an everlasting covenant with you,
my faithful love promised to David.

Wu Xia

Wu Xia movies (martial arts swordplay, often with a fantasy element). Why do I like them? Because the flying and fight choreography are graceful and powerful. The costumes, settings, and colors are very expressive. They can be fanciful, historical, imaginative, scary. The themes of honor, friendship, strength, and good vs. evil are universal and inspiring. I am by no means an expert. I only really started watching them after I saw Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon. But here are a couple of lists.

My 3 favorite:
Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon
Hero
A Chinese Ghost Story

I did like House of Flying Daggers, but not nearly as much as Hero. I felt the story was not as strong. It was too convoluted, but predictably so. There was an amazing scene in the early part of the movie, though. I would almost buy the DVD just for that. Almost.

I haven’t seen yet, but really want to:
Green Snake
The Bride with White Hair
Iron Monkey
The Shaolin Temple
The Legend

Now this is not a swordplay movie, but Stephen Chow mixes Kung Fu and comedy with genius. Shaolin Soccer had me howling with laughter. The premise is that a group of Kung Fu trained monks form a soccer team and use their special skills on the field. He has a new one that I haven’t seen yet. It’s called Kung Fu Hustle.

I was inspired today because I caught part of “The Art of Action: Martial Arts in Motion Pictures”, a 2002 TV documentary hosted by Samuel L. Jackson.

Great News!

My brother-in-law got a contract job upgrading and replacing computers for a large aerospace company. It will last for several months. We are so happy for him. It is a good start and takes some pressure off of him. We went out to dinner tonight to celebrate! I brought half home, which is unusual. I don't usually let being full stop me from finishing everything on my plate when I'm enjoying it. This was an alfredo, so it was very cheesy and rich. I'll enjoy it again tomorrow. Today was the last workshop at WorkSource. They have been a helpful resource and I enjoyed the other job seekers. We had a good group this week and today especially was a lot of fun. I will write more tomorrow, What Not To Wear is starting in 5 minutes.

Worship Songs

Today has been busy. We have a new music director at my church and tonight was the first rehearsal of our worship team with the new leader. He is a great musician and I'm so excited. It is also the first time I've been to a mid-week practice in about 8 months because I started teaching evenings in January. The job has been over for a couple of months, but I was so out of the habit that I never started going again. It was also a good time to worship God. I love worship music. The words to several songs especially spoke to me this week. Here are the lyrics to one of them.

Lord Reign In Me
by Brenton Brown, Copyright 1998

Over all the earth
You reign on high
Every mountain stream
Every sunset sky
But my one request
Lord my only aim
Is that You’d reign in me again

Lord reign in me
Reign in Your power
Over all my dreams
In my darkest hour
You are the Lord
Of all I am
So won’t You reign in me again

Over every thought
Over every word
May my life reflect
The beauty of myLord
‘Cause you mean more to me
Than any earthly thing
So won’t You reign in me again

This song is not where I am living every day right now, but it is where I need to be. This song is my prayer. My eyes have been looking down again and I've been too occupied with myself and my concerns. Lord, give me your vision for my days, my week, my life. Take my goals and put them in the correct order. Just like the exercise, I have also gotten lax again about spending time in prayer and studying the Bible. I have been so frustrated because I'm having trouble focusing on what kind of career to focus on and where my skills and temperament fit the best. God, help me to see clearly and give me a vision for a purposeful and satisfying vocation. Take my frustration and cover me in your peace. Thank You!

I'm Writing Again.

I have been unable to write anything for the last several days unless it was whiny tripe. I've been feeling discouraged and blah. I'm writing tonight before I go to sleep because I want to get over this bump. It has been over a week since I have exercised. Today I went to another insurance interview. Those seem to be the only companies that are showing any interest. I need to get a focused vision of what I really want to do so that I can take effective steps and know where to look. I guess that is my agenda for this week. My sister has been having a terrible time in Oklahoma. Today we got the news that her car engine is deceased. One good thing happened today. I met a friend and we had a great Thai dinner. I ordered asparagus in a yellow curry (but dry, without the coconut milk) with chicken. It was delicious. We had a great talk about life. She is about my age and also single. We have a lot of things in common as far as challenges and how we feel about things. For example, we both set ages for ourselves to adopt children if we found ourselves still single. I gave myself until 35, she chose 40. I have passed my deadline, but had already changed my mind about volunteering for single parenthood after seeing several friends raise newborns and toddlers. They had husbands as active fathers, but even two people are stretched thin with small children. It truly takes a village. I enjoyed being "Aunty Cheryl" and helping out; I also enjoyed going home. I am totally over that biological clock thing.

One more day until the two-year anniversary of my return from Korea. No specific plans how to mark the occasion.

Friday!

Yeah! It's Friday. Yesterday was the big job interview. I was kind of worked up and nervous on Wednesday. Surprise! When I took the company name down over the phone, I spelled it wrong by a couple of letters. Remember, I was barely awake when I got the call and did the short phone interview. He didn't offer the spelling of the name and I wasn't thinking clearly enough to ask. Besides, I thought it sounded simple enough. So it was not an aerospace company that offered language training to pilots and traffic control workers. It was an insurance company and they are looking for sales people. I got through the first in-person interview and then they asked me to return in half-an-hour to sit in on an informational meeting about the company and fill out a candidate profile test. The profile test was questions about what motivates me, would I lie, would I steal, what are my strengths and weaknesses, etc. I decided that it wasn't the opportunity for me and told them so later in the evening when they called me back to see if I would come back for a final interview.

Today I applied online for two more positions- a Marketing Specialist- Writer, and a Merchant Investigator. The second job is for an online retail company, so I'd be checking out the merchants that are participating to make sure they are serving the customers properly and checking for fraud. It sounds like it could be challenging and fun. I don't expect to hear back from them because I don't have all the experience that they want in retail and don't know anything about fraud prevention. I made my quota to file for unemployment, so that is the most important thing. Next week I'll finish the series of workshops. I hope I'll learn more good stuff and really get prepared to market myself in some new areas and make this a successful career change.

August 18th, next Thursday, will be the two-year anniversary of my return to the United States to start my new life. I should find some way to mark the occasion. My life here is still under construction, but I am full of hope. God has good plans, and I'm trying to follow His path.

What Not to Wear will be on soon. Better go now.

Garden at Gyungbok Palace 

Teaching in Korea

A couple of people have asked what it was like teaching in Korea. They were thinking of going there and teaching themselves. I thought I'd post my answer in case more people were interested in hearing what it was like.

I had a great time in Korea. As long as you have a bachelor's degree (in any subject) you should be able to get a job. The language schools really want native-speakers who can teach conversation and listening. Research your school before you go because there are lots of bad ones that don't treat people fairly and aren't honest. Try looking in the forums at Dave's ESL Cafe. Ask the representative of any school you are considering if you can have the e-mail of a foreign teacher working there who can vouch for the school and give you information about the local life. I recommend the experience of teaching overseas. The culture shock will be substantial and you will have lots of challenges. Any kind of teaching training you can get before you go would be helpful. The university jobs are better (fewer teaching hours, better pay, and better working conditions) but you generally need a master's degree. Most schools in Korea pay for your housing and the wages are fair, so you can save money or pay down debt. I made good progress on my student loans while I was there.

Seoul is a large, very crowded, fast-paced city. It was both exciting and stressful. When things got really overwhelming, I would go to Gyungbok Palace and walk around. It is a spacious, tranquil oasis in the middle of urban mayhem. Walking through the gate, I could breathe deeply again. For interesting reading on this palace, Minsoo Kang wrote a very descriptive though scholarly essay on its long history.

I also lived in Kwangju, which is far South of Seoul. It was very interesting to see another part of Korea. Seoul is the business and population center of the whole country. Literally almost 1/3 of the total population lives in the city or in the surrounding suburbs. Kwangju is a small, provincial city that has a history of being a conservative holdout. It was the site of famous labor protests. The pace was slower and the people more relaxed and friendly. There was traffic, but it was still easier to get around. After you had been there a while, it felt like a small community; you recognized many faces when you walked around the downtown area. The surrounding countryside is very pretty. About 50 minutes away are the Bosung Green Tea Plantations, neat rows of tea bushes terraced into the mountainside. Just outside the city is a Confucian scholar's garden, Sosoewon, which is about 600 years old.

As far as the experience of being a foreigner, it was both fun and difficult. I didn't know any Korean language before I went. It was hard to adjust to being helpless in some situations, but I had people at my school helping me. The most basic, necessary things you learn pretty quickly. Thankfully, the writing system is very easy to learn, so you can sound things out and start to read subway stops and things. A lot of those signs are also written in Roman alphabet, which helps. The Korean culture sometimes keeps foreigners at a distance, but they are also hospitable and kind. Occasionally bouts of anti-Americanism break out because of political things, but I never felt unsafe.

It was a hard decision to make, leaving Korea. I was torn because I had become so comfortable there, liked my job and had good friends. At the same time I had been living far away from my family for a long time. I finally decided that it was time to return to Washington State and live near my family. The longer I stayed in Korea, the harder it would have been to leave.

Interview Preparations

Tomorow I have an interview for a teaching related position. It may actually be teaching, but I won't find out any details until tomorrow. Preparations for the interview: printing out fresh copies of my resume and contact information of past employers. I also bought a new top to wear to the interview. I'm also going to use some notecards and write down some important things that I want to include in my answers to those delightfully fun interview questions. My personal favorite, "What are your greatest strengths and weaknesses?". My answer to that one is, "My strengths are listening to people, thinking creatively to solve problems, and cooperating with others as a member of a team. My weaknesses are being particular about details and putting pressure on myself to meet other people's expectations." The company is over an hour away. If I get the job, who knows how I'll get there. I don't have a car and can't afford one. But that's getting too far ahead, since I don't actually have the job yet. Dad is really excited for me. He wants to know that I have a good job and I am well provided for. Well, I wouldn't mind that, either.

I had a good night's sleep last night, so I have some energy back. Haven't done any exercise this week, though. Not good. Tomorrow afternoon I will do the walking tape.

Undivided Heart

I’m still really tired. It was very nice to see my aunt last night. Didn’t sleep too well. Mom woke me up and handed me the phone. Good morning, time for an impromptu phone interview. I guess it didn’t go too badly, though. I was invited to come to their office on Thursday for a face-to-face. I had no idea what the company was, so I googled them. They are an international aerospace tech company that also offers language training to pilots. Wow, a teaching position. It seems like it will be a very corporate atmosphere. I’ve been advised to “dress for success” when I come to the interview. Not that I don’t usually wear nice clothes to an interview, but I have never worked in a corporate setting and most of my clothes are not quite that formal. I’m glad that I bought that blazer! Took a long nap this afternoon. I’m still making progress in Ezekiel. Here is one of my favorite verses.

Ezekiel 11:18-20
“They will return to it (the land of Israel) and remove all its vile images and detestable idols. I will give them an undivided heart and put a new spirit in them; I will remove from them their heart of stone and give them a heart of flesh. Then they will follow my decrees and be careful to keep my laws. They will be my people, and I will be their God.”

I have heard this verse many times and read it quoted here and there. I love this verse. It is so easy for my heart and my attention to be divided so many ways. There is another similar verse.

Jeremiah 31:33-34
"This is the covenant I will make with the house of Israel after that time," declares the LORD. "I will put my law in their minds and write it on their hearts. I will be their God, and they will be my people. No longer will a man teach his neighbor, or a man his brother, saying, 'Know the LORD,' because they will all know me, from the least of them to the greatest," declares the LORD. "For I will forgive their wickedness and will remember their sins no more."

Ezekiel and Jeremiah were prophets at the same time. They lived right before the destruction of Jerusalem by the Babylonian empire. I like these verses because it is describing such a close relationship between God and believers. God did keep his promise to bring the exiles back to Israel. Nehemiah came back with a group of exiles and descendents that had been born in Babylon. Together they rebuilt the city in the face of opposition and threats from their neighbors. The temple was also eventually rebuilt. These verses offer hope in the middle of a dark time. God’s purpose was not to annihilate Israel, but to cleanse and restore His people. These verses also look forward to the new covenant (or contract) God would initiate with all people through Jesus. Now believers have the spirit of God living directly inside them, to guide and help them. We can have the same closeness with God described in these verses.

Back Home Again

I got home about 8:45 PM last night. It was a great weekend. I worked hard and had a lot of fun. Today I’ve been taking it a bit easy. There was an e-mail from an insurance company inviting me to an informational interview. I called and RSVP'd. I also took care of miscellaneous business- phone calls, gathering laundry, etc. A pretty routine day, not too hectic. I needed rest after the weekend. As usual at church retreats, we didn’t get a lot of sleep. My aunt is coming to spend the night. She couldn’t get on the flight tonight, so she will leave tomorrow. Instead of going back to stay near Grandpa, she’ll come here and stay with us. Her husband is a pilot, so she flies standby. It's always a gamble whether she'll get a seat. I’m glad, because now I’ll get to see her. More tomorrow, she’ll be here soon.

Away for the Weekend

This week has been a whirlwind. I haven't gone to sleep yet, but shortly after I finish this post my head will be resting on a pillow. I've been up late finishing some things before I leave for the weekend. I leave before lunch today and will come back Sunday evening. It's a church thing. My aunt is also in town, but because of the job workshops and this weekend, I won't be able to see her this trip. She came on Monday and will stay through the weekend for her high school reunion. Not much to say right now. I'm exhausted and obviously I won't be able to post anything this weekend. I'll catch up on Monday, I promise. Since I joined BlogExplosion, several people have left kind comments. It really encourages me to keep writing and posting regularly. I appreciate those who have taken the time to leave a comment. Thank you very much.

Evaluating the Week

Let's see how I did on that list of things to do this week.

Pray every day as 1st priority.

1. Apply for unemployment

2. Search for job listings online.

3. Rework my resume in a functional style.

4. Think about creative ideas for job/career directions.

5. Exercise 5 days.

6. Apply for at least 3 jobs.

I’ve been praying each day (not always before I do other things) and making progress in Ezekiel. It is a very interesting book. Right now I’m still in the gloom and judgment part of it, but there is a ray of hope. God marked a remnant of faithful people to save from destruction. They were the ones who refused to bow down to the idols of the day and were saddened by the corruption and vice that they saw around them. How can that apply to myself in today’s culture? What idols am I personally tempted to bow to? (selfishness, money/success, overindulging physical appetites). You see, the Bible is absolutely relevant, even the Old Testament. (God, please help me to stay true to you.) Now some are offended at the very idea of judgment. Let me just say this. If you really read the Old Testament, God would give warnings to Israel and do everything he could to remind the people of what was right and what they needed to do before he handed down the punishment. It wasn’t capricious and He did not take pleasure in it. Jesus provided the ultimate answer to that cycle. God knew that none of us could fulfill the law perfectly. The purpose of the law is to open our eyes to see that we have done wrong and that we need God. He sent Jesus to take the punishment so that we could be reconciled with God by believing in Jesus and asking for forgiveness.

I did everything, except I’m short one day on exercise and didn't meet the minimum job applications. I could do a walking tape tonight after it has cooled off. I was thinking today, “Once I start working, how am I going to keep up with this journal, exercise, and everything else?” I’m so spoiled now, having plenty of time to do all these personal things and the down time to just let my mind wander. I’m the kind of person that needs to have some down time or space during the day to recharge and refresh myself. I’m spending hours looking at job listings, too, but at home at my own convenience and pace. OK, stop whining, Cheryl. We have a new saying in the house that a friend of my mother’s introduced a couple of weeks ago, “Put on your big girl panties, and deal with it”. Work is a part of life. Once I have a new job, I’ll be excited about it and glad to have somewhere to go and be productive.

I applied for only one job, not 3. The reason is that it’s hard to find job listings that fit me very well. That’s the trick of trying to go a new career direction- you don’t have prior experience in the job you want or all the qualifications that they are asking for. I’ve found technical writing jobs, but they are not entry level. Even office jobs want more software experience than I have. I don’t know how to use Access or Power Point. I’m still getting familiar with Excel. They also want experience in an office setting. I don’t think I want to be an executive assistant, anyway. The library jobs I’ve found require one or more years of experience and a degree or at least some training. Good thing that tomorrow I’ll be going to the WorkSource workshops on identifying skills and finding job/career fields that suit you well. That should provide some encouragement and hopefully I can get a few new ideas. I need new ideas.

Summer Heat

I exercised today! Instead of doing the Leslie Sansone Walk Away the Pounds tape, I actually walked outside. I went to a local park and walked 3 times around the perimeter. It is a very small park, so it was probably just a little over a mile. It took 25 minutes. Being outside was a nice change, but it was hot. We’ve been having gorgeous summer weather. After the walk I had a fruit juice popsicle (no sugar added). which cooled me off right away. Then for dinner I ate a huge portion of a family favorite, Chicken Picante Casserole. My brother-in-law teased my sister over the phone by telling her what we were eating for dinner tonight. I could practically hear her scream over the phone! Our family had this casserole it for the first time about 15 years ago, maybe longer. It’s a layered chicken enchilada sort of thing, except we no longer bother to layer it. We just tear up all the corn tortillas and mix up the chicken and everything else together in a giant bowl and then put it in a 9 X 13 pan to bake. It tastes just as good and is much less fuss than layering everything. It is a full fat recipe. We’ve tried to use low-fat cheese and substitute some other ingredients, but the flavor never stood up. I haven’t been making any effort to eat healthier. That is the next step and I’m not excited about it.

I now have the top I was salivating after yesterday, plus a great pair of grey pin-striped slacks! They didn’t have those at the other store. I promise, or I would have bought them at the first store because that is the store that I worked at over the holiday season last year. Now every time I go into that store I get to catch up with the women that I worked with. There was big news yesterday, one is engaged and another is pregnant. They gave me an application, too, and said that they’ll start hiring some seasonal help soon. Probably for back to school and then keep people on through Christmas. I took the application, but have no intention of turning it in because I really don’t like working retail. My coworkers were great, but it isn’t a job that I could support myself with. The only full time positions are management.

I found a couple of really interesting job listings today, though. One is as a student advisor. I could do that really well and I pray that I can get an interview.

A Day of Fun

I saw Charlie and the Chocolate Factory today and did some sale shopping at my favorite clothing store, Lane Bryant. Tried on almost half the store before I started finding things that I was happy with. For some reason everything was looking better on the hangers. I ended up with one pair of jeans, a light sweater, and pajamas. They have a lovely top that goes underneath the sweater, but they were all out in my size. I liked it so much that I asked them to call other stores to find my size. They found one at another mall about 30-40 minutes away. I will pick it up tomorrow. I wish I could show a picture. It is sort of a camisole top, but the straps are wider, more like a tank top except it is not a knit fabric. The color is sky blue and the sweater matches. The top has satiny fabric overlaid on the bust with some sheer, organza type fabric that crosses over. Didn't I tell you a picture would be better! The words make it seem lame, but I promise it is lovely. I didn't exercise today, but I can still fit in 5 days this week. Why the frivolous outing today? Because a friend had the day off of work and came over to visit. She lives a little over an hour away, so we don't get together often. We both thought that the movie was a lot of fun. Johny Depp was definitely quirky and creepy as Willy Wonka. I bet he was having a great time. I remember Kate Winslett saying in the DVD extra documentary that Johny would constantly goof around and entertain the boys on the set while they were making Finding Neverland. She described him as a great big kid. He is clearly very intelligent, but I can also see that he embraces a childlike sense of wonder and a delightful imagination in some of the roles that he choses and the freedom he has to abandon himself to very silly antics. Take Pirates of the Carribean for example, or Edward Scisorhands, another Tim Burton film. I think Depp and Burton have similar dark, silly and quirky humor. Oh, don't forget the glee with which Depp played the hopelessly inept and endlessly enthusuastic director of B movies, Ed Wood. Tim Burton directed that as well. Corpse Bride, another stop-motion animated feature by Tim Burton, was one of the movies previewed. It looks great and goes directly onto my "Must see..." list. Do you remember Nightmare Before Christmas? Not for every taste, but I loved it.

A Great Start of the Week

Happy at the end of the day. I lit a couple of candles and have a glass of red wine to set the mood while I type this update. I exercised yesterday and today, so I’m on track for my goal of 5 days of exercise this week. I finished my resume and cover letter, making the changes that the Work Source counselor suggested. I updated my online resumes at Careerbuilder and Monster.com. They hadn’t been touched since October 2003. Yesterday I applied for unemployment. It took about 15 minutes on the phone. For some reason I was dreading it, but it wasn’t bad at all. I have also been praying and reading the Bible like I should. I started the book of Ezekiel, which I don’t believe that I’ve ever read through. Only about 7 years ago did I start appreciating the Old Testament. Before that I thought it was old, dusty, violent and unpleasant history. What made me change my mind? I started reading it regularly. (Yes, novel idea, I know.) I had a One Year Bible, which gives you readings each day from the Old Testament, a Psalm, a few verses from Proverbs, and the New Testament. Reading it this way helped me appreciate how common themes are woven so intricately through the whole Bible. The New Testament also quotes and refers directly to the Old Testament fairly regularly. There are reading plans that you can get online and follow. Verse of the Day has several plans outlined, each organized differently. For example chronological or by literary style (poetry, prophecy, history, letters). The cat has gained another 3 ounces. Mom weighed her yesterday.

Sunday Drive

Today was a really beautiful summer day. We've been having a heat wave for the last week, except for Friday when it was very rainy. A heat wave for Washingtonians, that is. The highs have been in the 80's (Fahrenheit) and we all think we are melting. Dad proposed a leisurely afternoon drive, so we went toward Mt. Ranier through some of the little towns in the valley. We stopped in Wilkeson and had delicious ice cream at a cafe/ice cream shop in the town center.

Wilkeson Town Center 

What's Really My First Task?

To do this week:

1. Apply for unemployment (I’ve never done this before and I’ve been putting it off. But I do need the money. Suck it up and do it.)

2. Search for job listings online.

3. Rework my resume in a functional style.

4. Think about creative ideas for job/career directions.

5. Exercise 5 days.

6. Apply for at least 3 jobs.

Most importantly, pray before I do all of these things. None of the things I need to figure out and changes that I need to make (exercise, eating healthy, career, etc.) are going to happen if I don’t pray. Recently, however, I’ve been making excuses not to pray. Chores, activities, writing, surfing the Internet. I am going to make sure I do first things first, and that means not cutting prayer and Bible study short. I can do all things through God, but without him everything I do is worthless.

John 15:4
"Remain in me, and I will remain in you. For a branch cannot produce fruit if it is severed from the vine, and you cannot be fruitful apart from me."

Oh, someone directed me to this site regarding the Palm Pictures. Evidently it is a production and distribution company that has been around for a while.

New Movie Feature at Comcast OnDemand!

Today was the last day of Serengeti Trek. It was a great week with the kids. If I have the time next summer, I'll do it again.

I am so excited about something that I discovered last night. There is a new feature in the OnDemand section of Comcast digital cable. It is in the Free Movie section, called Palm Pictures. I am guessing that they want to associate by name with the "Palm D'Or" of the Cannes festival. It is a film festival hosted on cable TV, featuring independent, foreign, and short films. Viewers can vote for favorite movies and they claim it can affect decisions to release some of these films in the theaters or on DVD. Sounds kind of cool. I checked out what movies were there and found a good Korean film, JSA (Joint Security Area). It is a murder mystery/political thriller set at the DMZ. I hope that I can get my dad and brother-in-law to watch it with me. Anyone who may read this and have access to OnDemand, I highly recommend this movie. It was a huge blockbuster in Korea when it came out in the late 90's. The story is tense and dramatic. Dealing with North and South, it could easily have fallen into simplistic cardboard characters, but the main characters are complex and compelling.

Today has been busy. The only thing I haven't done in the past three days is to take any action about my job search. I need to get that new resume done and scour the 'net for good jobs. I also need to make calls and do research about the kind of job and career I really want. I actually wish that I could find a good work-at-home opportunity that wasn't sales or a scam.

Live to Eat

My family likes food. I enjoy eating good food. While I'm not an especially picky eater, I do feel that life is too short to waste time eating boring or unappetizing food. I am not talking about eating fancy all the time. I like a wide variety of foods. There are two fast food items that I can't resist. One is a Frugals' bacon and swiss burger (they use thick-sliced smoky bacon and real swiss cheese, not processed cheese). The other is a jumbo sized burrito with quacamole, sour cream and everything else from Taco Del Mar. Mom and I watch the Food Network sometimes. We especially like 30 Minute Meals and Food 911. We've also seen random episodes of some other series, like Calorie Comando, Paula's Home Cooking and Everyday Italian. We have tried some recipes and gotten ideas for tweaking familar dishes. I found the only chili recipe that I will ever use again on Calorie Comando (Turkey Sausage Chili). Be careful with the chipotle chilies in adobo sauce, though. We cut those in half and it was still very hot. I like heat, but in moderation. A couple of weeks ago Mom surprised Dad by making Tyler's chicken satay recipe from a Food 911 episode. It was delicious and very easy to make. Here are some of the recipes I've printed out and haven't tried yet.

* Coconut Shrimp with Red Curry Sauce (Food 911, same episode as the satay)
* Spaghetti and Meatballs (Food 911, the meatballs are stuffed with fresh mozzarella)
* Grilled T-Bone with Chipotle Chili Rub and Cilantro-Lime Compound Butter (30 Minute Meals)
* Chicken in Tarragon Cream Sauce, White and Wild Rice with Walnuts (30 Minute Meals)
* Stuffed Baby Eggplant (Food 911)
* Ottoman Empire Yogurt Soup (Food 911, same episode as the eggplant)
* Pan Seared Salmon with Sour Cream and Dill (Food 911)

If you want any of these recipes, they are at the Food Network website. There is a very handy "find an episode"search where you choose the title of the show and can type in topic words, like "Thai", or "eggplant".

The Cat Came Back

Selfish me. I put the cat down so that I could type. Ahhh, she still has claws on her back paws. They were digging into my shoulder; she just leapt up and is settling down again across my arms. Her fascination with computers started at the neighbors' house. He wrote his whole master's thesis with Scruffy draped over his arms. She is indeed a well-educated and most helpful cat. I don't, however, recommend her as a typist. She will not take no for an answer, but what respectable cat would? That was before the cat sharing arrangement started, about 3 years ago.

You see, originally, Scruffy was owned by other neighbors down the street. They moved and she stayed behind (lost or abandoned, who knows?) She camped on the doorstep of our neighbors' house in the middle of winter. Our neighbor doesn't like cats at all, but she couldn't leave a forlorn little beast to die in the cold. Scruffy stayed there and the husband became quite fond of her. He was home a lot studying and writing and they bonded at the computer. After some time she was banned from the neighbors' house and allowed only in their garage. Why would they do that? It is a long story, but the short version is that Scruffy had an accident on the rug and you don't want to mess with that woman's house, ever. About that time, Mom was asked to feed Scruffy while the neighbors were away on a trip. She loves cats and has actually wanted to have one for years, but my dad refuses. He swore when our last pet passed that there would be no more. While she was pet-sitting, she would bring Scruffy to our house and let her sit in her lap and cuddle for a while every day. Ever since then, Scruffy has become a regular visitor at our house. She is quite elderly and recently has been ill. Mom and the neighbors took her to the vet. She is slowly gaining weight. Mom weighed her again on Monday and she was 5 lbs. 3 ounces. You can't tell by her behavior that she was ever sick. In fact, my Dad even said, "Look at her run!" as she jauntily jogged into the kitchen for a drink of water. My brother-in-law is working on his class work. Maybe she will help him, too.

I took a survey for a study of blogging and bloggers. You can participate if you have a blog. It didn't take too long.

At the Close of the Day

I’m happily tired. Satisfactorily busy. The Vacation Bible School is so much fun, even more than I expected. I actually didn’t know quite what to expect, since I’ve never participated in it, except when I attended as a child.

I had that appointment with the job counselor at Work Source this afternoon. She had some excellent advice about my resume and cover letter. I am going to make a functional style resume that focuses on my skills and what I have done at my jobs. She also told me that my cover letter was way too detailed and told me what to cut out of it. I'll be working on that.

Mom and I exercised today for the first time in 5 days. We are not going to quit!

It has been fun to spend some time hanging out with my brother-in-law. We watched Billy Elliot last night. I haven’t seen him in three years. I only met him for the first time 3 days before my sister’s wedding in April 2000. They met online and had a long-distance relationship. I was also in Massachusetts at the time, so I didn’t see my sister much during her engagement, either. But my family embraced him very quickly. He has a great, off-beat sense of humor that fits in well with all of us. He is also is head and shoulders above anyone else that my sister ever dated. He treats her well. He gives her pedicures, manicures, cooks, and encourages her. He helps her stay focused and motivated on her goals for her health and career. I am not sure exactly how much weight she has lost in the last year-and-a-half, but it is close to 100. She is gaining her health and her confidence. They also support each other spiritually, reminding each other to pray through all difficulties and to gain strength from reading and studying the Bible. I know it is hard for her waiting back in Oklahoma until he has a job here. I know that both of them will do what it takes to make sure that she comes here to Washington before too long. He estimates a couple of months.

Snake River 

He's Here!

My brother-in-law is here. He arrived early this morning at the end of a marathon drive from Oklahoma. He shared some of his road pictures with me.

It has been a busy day. I went to church and then we had to decorate the sanctuary, fellowship hall, and the foyer for the Serengeti Trek VBS program. Didn't make the special surprise recipe today, so that will wait for another time. We went to Ruby Tuesday instead. I love their Buffalo tenders.

Improve your writing? Practice, practice, practice...

I don’t know what to write about. I have made several false starts and can’t get anywhere. What do you do when you have a block? I wanted to read a story for an audio entry, but that didn’t go well. There is a time limit for the audioblogger entries and the story was too long. I thought I'd just record it in two parts, but it was still not easy. I kept starting again because I would make a mistake or want another chance to improve my storytelling performance. Twice I was interrupted in the middle of recording. Finally I gave up. I was being called to dinner: special deli hotdogs, potato salad, and baked beans. No frills, but satisfying summer fare. I thought about posting a list or a series of lists. I’ve seen it done before. But I could not think of anything more exciting than “My Favorite Movies”. I started a “To Do:” list. I didn’t want to do anything.

164 words. This entry wouldn’t even count for 100 words. I found this project a long time ago and thought it was a great concept. If you like writing, you might even participate and find it an interesting experiment. How much can you say in 100 words?

Who needs sleep?

Last night I got sucked into BlogExplosion and stayed up all night. How strange that just yesterday I reminisced about a time years ago when I didn’t sleep. Only this time I didn’t stand up a friend. I stood up my Mom because she wanted get an early start on doing some work around the house. At least we did eventually get a decent amount of work done today. I really didn’t intend not to sleep. What happened was that I decided to join this promotion site and then I was surfing all these blogs all night. Yes, I was also earning points that mean other people are surfing my blog. I admit it, I do want people to read what I’m writing here. I do put some effort into it, after all. BlogExplosion certainly can help expose your site. It is kind of an exchange system where you login and surf other member blogs and other members will visit your site. Those points translate directly to hits. I found some really interesting sites written by other people that I am definitely going to return to. Hours flew by; before I knew it, Dad walked through the computer area on his way out the door to work. “Good morning, you’re up early”, he said with surprise. He usually leaves at 5:30 AM. I can count on one hand the number of times I’ve been awake to greet him in the morning. I usually wake up between 9:00 and 9:30 AM. Today I went to bed around 6:00 AM and woke up at 11:00 AM. Can't get away with that tonight, though. I am going to a Walk To Emmaus community celebration and picnic lunch in Marysville. The festivities will start at 9:00 AM.

The purging continues. Today more surprises unearthed in the form of a bag full of books, a lot of them old favorites. It was a mixture of children’s books, which I like to collect, Christian reference books, a biography of J.R.R. Tolkein, and a couple of classic novels. Here is a list of some of the titles I was so pleased to find.

Hinds Feet on High Places by Hannah Hurnard (A classic alegory of Christian life.)
Danny the Champion of the World by Roald Dahl (I was riveted when my elementary school teacher read this beautiful father and son adventure and survival tale aloud to us.)
Sarah, Plain and Tall by Patricia MacLachlan (I read this aloud to my 3rd grade class as a student teacher. It is the only good memory I have of student teaching.)
Great Expectations by Charles Dickens (What can I say? I think this is his best work.)
A Shepherd Looks at the 23rd Psalm by Phillip Keller (A delightful meditation on the most familiar Psalm which makes it new all over again.)

Flotsam and Jetsam Surface from the Past

News about the cat. We weighed her and she was 5 lbs. on our scale. She has more energy and is definitely acting like she feels better. She was extremely clingy for a few days. Mom called her “Velcro kitty”. She has always liked to sit in your lap or in front of the keyboard when you are at the computer. These days she will definitely not leave you alone if you are on the computer. When I’m at my laptop there is no room on the desk and the touch pad is directly in front of the keyboard, so she can’t sit there. Instead she drapes herself across my arms and makes it very hard to type. She isn’t here now, or I couldn’t type an entry. We are very happy that she is recovering.

I finished my full resume on the state site so I can take tests online and apply for jobs with Washington State. It took a long time to finish because I couldn’t just cut and paste from my resume file. They also wanted complete address information for every job in my employment history. I had to dig in a file to get addresses for my oldest jobs.

Mom and I spent some time today preparing a room for my brother-in-law who will arrive sometime late on Saturday evening. He is driving from Oklahoma. We want to make sure he is comfortable and feels welcome. I suggested a special recipe that we should prepare on Sunday to celebrate his arrival. It’s one we saw on Food 911. I want it so be a surprise, so I can’t say what it is. My sister reads my journal and I am sure that he also has the address.

We are also purging some stuff and preparing a donation for a charity that will come to our house next week. We have purged a lot of stuff since I returned in 2003. There is still more to go. I thought that since I have been moving at least every 3 years all of my adult life, which forces regular purges of extra belongings, that I didn’t have much flotsam and jetsam cluttering my life. As I have helped my mom purge, I have also gone through my own stuff and it is surprising what I have managed to keep. Since coming home, I’ve gone through several boxes of stuff from college and even earlier, like digging through archeological layers. Of course this older stuff was left behind at my parent’s home while I was traipsing all around. It is only fair that now I help Mom sort stuff out and get her house back. Some fossils found in the strata: two grade reports from middle school, my SAT score record, and judges’ evaluation sheets from the district solo voice contest from each year of high school (83-87).

Today in the spare room I stumbled upon a small stash of cards, letters, and assorted papers from my first two years of college. The only thing I am keeping is a beautiful card from my grandmother with a note with news about what she had been doing that week, just to keep in touch. I also found several letters from one of my few good friends that I had in high school. I was not social and had very few friends then. Unfortunately, we didn’t keep in touch after the first year of college because I accidentally stood her up when were both home for Christmas break. I had stayed up really late the night before (I sometimes had insomnia back then) and slept until noon or so the next day. We were supposed to meet at 9:00 AM or something like that. I called her and left an apology on the answering machine. I called her several times, but she would not return any of my calls. I wrote to her, too. She never accepted my apology. I paused, thinking for a minute about keeping them, before I put her letters in the bag of paper for recycling. I hadn’t thought about her in years. I wonder where she is. I hope she is well and happy. I suppose I should go to my next high school reunion and see if she is there. Oooh, maybe not. I can’t imagine enjoying the “haven’t I been wonderfully successful and look how cool I still am” competition with all the people who were little more than strangers to me even back then.

Happy Endorphines

"Exercise gives you endorphines, endorphines make you happy, happy people just don't shoot their husbands....they just don't." - Legally Blonde.

This movie was on TBS or TNT or whatever last night and I had it on in the background while I was on the computer doing my journal and wandering around the Internet. I thought this was an amusing quote and a good start for today's entry since it ties in with today's main subject. Mom and I have continued our exercising. We have skipped a few times and we still don't do it every day, but we both feel good to have a start and encourage each other to keep it up. Soon I'll start doing the pilates work out and alternate days. I believe that 4 days a week of cardio should be the minimum. I'll have to check out some exercise information to make sure. 5 days of cardio would be best, I think. Some days I may want to do both and other days I can just do pilates. Pilates is good for strenth, balance, and toning. Toning helps you burn more calories all day long, no matter what you're doing. Mom can really tell the difference when she exercises because her back doesn't hurt. Of course, for so long a sore back was a good excuse for not exercising. Now it is clear that the exercise is vital to keep her back strong and stop pain from robbing her of activity and quality of life. I'm so pleased for her. I know it is helping me, too, althought the results aren't so noticeable yet. I am conerned about my heart and my blood pressure, though. I know that at my last check up two years ago my blood pressure was not good. My heart rate could be lower in general. That is a sign of poor cardio conditioning. I try and be very careful when I exercise not to push myself too hard and overstrain my heart. I watch my breathing and listen carefully to how my body feels. I know it would be best to monitor these things with regular checks, but I don't have any insurance.

I am going to put my resume on the Washington State employment site so I can look for and apply for state jobs. I'm not sure what I expect to find, but the counselor recommended it when I was there almost two weeks ago. I will also call the Work Source office again and see if I can make an appointment. I wonder if she has checked her messages! Wait! - The phone just rang and it was... You genius, how did you guess? She returned my call and I have an appointment for late afternoon on the 19th. She will be out of the office the rest of the week. There are other counselors in the office. I don't want to give the idea that there is no one working at the state employment office. I suppose I could insist on seeing one of the other counselors, but I'm willing to drag my feet for a while. You know I don't enjoy this process. If I don't think I'm getting much accomplished after another meeting or two with her, I may ask to see another counselor. There is also a series of workshops that may have some helpful information and tips on searching and interviewing. I plan to attend those. The next series is the week of the 18th through the 22nd. However, that week is the week of Serenghetti Trek. It is this summer's vacation Bible school program at my church. I volunteered to be an assistant teacher. The registration for those is already full, anyway.

Fear or Faith?

What is the scariest thing about being single? For me it is one thing; the thought of being elderly, ill, destitute, and all alone. Of course, this can happen to widows and widowers as well. My grandmother was widowed in late middle-age and lived almost 4 decades as a widow. She never married again. But she was never ill, destitute, and all alone. Quite the contrary, she was always close to friends and family. But if you are single and never have any children, what family do you have when you are in your advanced years? If you get sick and have no money or any family around you, what can you do? You are utterly alone, forgotten, forlorn, and desperate. The desire for security leads me to seek for something to trust in this world. But God is ultimately the provider of all good things. He knows every need we have. God is able to provide finances, help and friends. He already has in other situations. Why would that change in the future? It also discounts the power of friendship. As long as I remain social and nurture healthy friendships, I don’t need to fear being forgotten and abandoned. Even if that did happen, God would stay constantly near me in my suffering until it was time to welcome me home to the place that he has been preparing for me. He promised, “Let not your heart be troubled. Trust in God. Trust also in me… I go to prepare a place for you.” (John 14:1-3). That is what Jesus told the disciples and it is true for all those who believe in him. So whether I marry eventually or not, it does not change the source of my security. There is no reason to fear. He also promised, “For I know the plans I have for you, declares the LORD, plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.” (Jeremiah 29:11).

There is someone I occasionally see who gets on my nerves. Mostly because he reminds me of what the culture of the American Dream values most and how it measures people. His conversation is mostly like this, “Steve Foster has done really well. He’s made a lot of money in Real Estate. He sold a 2 million dollar house on Lake Washington to one of the Seahawk players. He married Jill, one of the Meyer girls from the old neighborhood. They travel to Europe every year and take cruises. They have 3 great kids who have great jobs and make a very good living. The oldest just got married and her husband is a doctor. They bought their first house for over 700,000 dollars. They can afford it.” (names changed to protect the innocent. Ha Ha.) It is all about how much money people’s houses cost, having a great career, earning a high salary to pay for the house, and associating with well known people. He loves to drop names. It makes me nuts to listen to him for too long. I admit that it wouldn’t make me quite so frustrated if I had any of those things. It feeds into the part of me that still would like to have some security and to feel recognition and approval from the world around me. But I can’t buy into those values as the real measure of my worth as a person. I need to be more like another person I saw today. She is a feisty rebel and has never apologized for who she is. She has gone against the grain and led an unconventional life. She raised her children as a single mother when there were very few single parents. She worked in a male dominated career and provided successfully for her family. She is strong-willed, brash, funny, courageous. She is a risk-taker.

The Lady Washington 

The Cuauhtemoc, from Mexico and the Pallada, from Russia 

Rambling on and on

I have updated my resume, written a new cover letter, and made a new contact information sheet list of former employers for reference purposes. I haven't actually applied for any jobs yet. I tried to make another appointment with the job counselor, but she didn't answer my voicemail. When I called again, a couple of days later, her box was full and couldn't take any new voice messages.

I had a really great chat with my sister on IM today. It is so great to be able to do that. We shared photos back and forth and talked about silly things and about preparations for their relocation back to Washington. After the chat I read her journal, which I do more since she has been writing a lot lately. She wrote a really expressive, touching entry a couple of days ago about how she is overwhelmed by her husband's imminent departure to get things started here in Washington. I had to write her an e-mail in response. I know she is stronger than she thinks she is. I can't express how I appreciate the ability of the Internet to help us keep in touch with so many people no matter where they are. Of course there are cell phones and lots of plans that have no long distance charges, at least within North America. Still, I'mthrilled with the power of Internet communication tools.

One of the things my sister and I love to talk about is one of our favorite shows, What Not To Wear. They had a special three episode installment last night called What Went Wrong with outtakes and the moment where the first and only person ever refused their offer. In the end, it was all very anticlimactic and I'm glad that I was multitasking by doing stuff on the computer while it was on.

Now let me tell you about some accidental shopping yesterday. I took my photos to get developed and wandered around the mall. I went into my Lane Bryant store and they had a blazer that fit me nicely, except for the sleaves of course. I always have to have sleaves shortened. Thank God that they sell petite length pants and jeans or I'd have to have the legs shortened on each pair. I don't have any blazers and I've been wanting to find one for about a year. They didn't have many and only two in my size, so I had to jump on it before it was too late. Today I dropped it off at the tailor to get the sleaves shortened and in one week I can pick it up.

The pictures from the Tall Ships Festival in Tacoma turned out well. I'll post a couple to the journal.

There has been a little drama about the neighbors' cat. She has been ill and then disappeared for a couple of weeks. She returned yesterday and Mom and the neighbors together took her to the vet. They were expecting to have to put her to sleep. She is down to 4 pounds and looks like a skeleton with ratty tufts of fur. It's hard to see her like that. Incredibly, the vet didn't find any critical medical issues other than a horrible flea infestation and probable worms. He advised treating those and was hopeful that she would recover well. She was purring and took food and water while she was there. She didn't act like she was ready to go. From now on She will spend most days at our house and evenings/nights next door. She will be carried over and custody transered by hand. We have had an unusual kind of cat sharing arrangement with our neighbors for several years. Don't ask me to explain the whole story, please. Mom will have to do that in her own journal.

Yesterday evening I happened upon American Splendor on cable TV. What a great, surprising find. It is refreshing, unique, sarcastic, gritty, and even warm hearted at times while not being sentimental in the slightest. Paul Giamatti gives a wonderful performance as Harvey. Between this movie, Sideways, and Cinderella Man, I feel he has earned himself a reputation as a virtuoso comic and character actor. It's the story of Harvey Pekar, an underground comic book writer (he doesn't do the illustrations although he does sketch the page layouts with stick figures). He basically started making an autobiography in comic book form and it is titled American Splendor. He became very well known among comic book fans and even made regular appearances on David Letterman for a while in the 80's. Note to self: remember to ask my brother-in-law if he has ever read any of the comics. They would perfectly suit his taste and off-beat sense of humor.

Coming out of Hiding

I have been kind of hiding a bit since the end of class. I haven't known what to do with myself or what is next. I went into denial mode for a while. A couple of good things have happened in this time, though. I have started exercising with my mom. We both really need it. We do a Leslie Sansone one mile aerobic walking video. It has been about a week and a half since we started. We do it about every-other day. Last weekend I went on a weekend retreat called Walk to Emmaus. It was fantastic and I am really excited about getting started on things again. I needed to recharge my spiritual life and get a new perspective. I learned a lot and was really blessed. I recommend it highly. Weekends are offered all around the United States and even in other countries. It is similar to Cursillo, or Tres Dias.

In about 17-18 days my brother-in-law will arrive. He is coming ahead to look for a job before my sister comes. She'll continue her job in Oklahoma until He gets a job here. Then she'll sell their condo and come on over. I am excited and wondering how the transition will be for him and for my sister. I know it will be tough for her to stay in Oklahoma by herself.

I am going to go to Work Source Washington tomorrow and start gathering information about new jobs and what resources are available to help find work and get career guidance.

Party Prep

Party! Today is the day. I've been preparing for the party most of the day. I'm excited. I made a special chocolate cake, called "Turtle Cake". It's from the Cake Doctor cookbook. I am not a baker, but this is not too difficult for me. Like the candy, it turns out really gooey with caramel, pecans and lots of chocolate. There is melted semi-sweet chocolate on the top! Other students are bringing tamales, chicken mole, and flan. My mouth is watering in anticipation. I hope that the couple with the new baby come with the whole family. I bought film for my camera and will take pictures to document the evening. I chose two songs that I've been practicing for the sing-a-long. They are Ob-La-Di, Ob-La-Da, by The Beatles, and Country Roads, by John Denver. It's always a bit of a challenge to chose the right song because it has to be singable, have lyrics that aren't too difficult, and be playable on the guitar. I think these are fun songs and the students will be able to sing them pretty easily. I also have lots of great feelings about Country Roads because we used to listen to John Denver in the car on every road trip and vacation. We were usually camping. When I sing Country Roads I feel like I'm back driving over a mountain pass with my family. As much fun as we had, it was always so good to come home. We were all tired and missing the comforts of home after 10-12 days driving and camping.